Feedback is an important part of the leader-follower relationship. Feedback helps us learn, grow and improve. It helps uncover our strengths and indicates areas we can work on. Unfortunately, for many supervisors, the focus tends to be on ‘constructive criticism’, rather than positive feedback. By using the word ‘constructive’, the behaviour of pointing out discrepancies and mistakes is somehow transformed into being virtuous – a favour for the other person. Let’s instead replace ‘constructive criticism’ with ‘corrective feedback’. Create a learning moment. Teach the individual how to improve.
Being courteous and respectful towards another is not a weakness. Rather, failing to be courteous and respectful demonstrates a massive personal deficiency. There will be individuals you meet who are difficult to work with. There will be people who we perceive as less motivated, less skilled, and less informed. The thing is, who are we to judge? How can we really know what is going on in another’s life? We should assume that every person we meet has a battle going on behind the scenes. That criticism and pointing out more mistakes is the last thing they need.
We should always refrain from humiliating others. Call out bad behaviour, absolutely; but, if you are in a leadership position, and you need to give one of your employees corrective feedback, you do so privately. Do not chastise followers in front of their peers. If the issue needs to be addressed immediately, as there is a risk to safety, by all means go ahead, but do so respectfully and follow up later with a lesson. Never state that the person is an idiot or that they are stupid. Keep the focus on the act, the behavior, not the person. Remember to remain curious. There may have been circumstances or sound logic that resulted in the act.
Those who humiliate, criticise in public, or make snide remarks, are weak. They lack self-esteem and are tearing others down to make themselves feel better. We need to build one another up. Praise the good. There is always something positive to be said … even if it is just a thanks for showing up!
The Warrior-Womxn's Guild 